Funny One Liners

1. Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
   
2. Are you a surgeon? CAuse you've just took my heart away!
   
3. Have I seen you before? OH yeah it was in the dictionary under the word KABLAM!!
   
4. There must be a keg in your pants, cuz I want to tap that ass.
   
5. You're like milk, I want to make you a part of my complete breakfast.
   
6. My pickup line was published on the Internet... Would you like to hear it.
   
7. Hey gorgeous the power company is looking for you you're so electrifying.
   
8. I'm not actually this tall. I'm sitting on my wallet.
   
9. Excuse me, but I think I dropped something!!! MY JAW!!
   
10. Is your name Gillette? ...because you're the best a man can get.
    
11. I want to melt in your mouth, not in your hand.
    
12. Hi, I make more money than you can spend.
    
13. Bond. James Bond
    
14. How do you like your eggs cooked? Why? Well I just wanted know what to make for you in the morning!
    
    
15. If I pet you, would you follow me home?
    
16. I'm not wearing any pants.
    
17. I'd like to wrap your legs around my head and wear you like a feed bag.
    
18. I love the way you move...like butter on a bald monkey.
    
19. You remind me of my Grandma except I haven't slept with you yet.
    
20. You stole my heart. But that's okay; I have another one at home in the fridge.
    
21. Do you just wanna get naked?
    
22. Do you work for UPS? 'Cause I swear I saw you checking out my package!
    
23. Why do I have a pierced tongue? You'll soon find out.
    
24. Are you free tonight or is it gonna cost me?
25. Your body's name must be Visa, because it's everywhere I want to be.
    
26. Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money.
    
27. I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your bed rock.
    
28. I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
    
29. Yo Baby, you be my Dairy Queen, I'll be your Burger King, you treat me right, and I'll do it your way.
    
    
30. Excuse me, do you have your phone number, I seem to have lost mine.
    I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.
    
31. I'm new in town, could I have directions to your house.
    
32. Wanna come over for some pizza and sex? No? Why? Don't you like pizza?
    
33. If you were a new hamburger at McDonald's, you would be McGorgeous.
    
34. You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
    
35. That's a nice shirt. Can I talk you out of it?
    
36. There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you.
    
37. Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see!
    
38. Was your father a thief? 'Cause someone stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.
    
    
39. Your daddy must have been a baker, 'cause you've got a nice set of buns.
    
40. Do you have a map? I just keep on getting lost in your eyes.
    
41. Is it that cold out or are you just smuggling tic-tac's.
    
42. Excuse me I lost my teddy bear will you sleep with me tonight.
    
43. If you were a buger I would pick you first.
    
44. Are your pants from outer space? 'cause your butt is out of this world.
    
45. Are you a parking ticket? 'cause you got fine-fine-fine written all over ya.
    
46. I can't wait until tomorrow. She replys why not. You say cause you look better everyday.
    
47. Are you tired? Cause you've been running through my mind all day!
    
48. If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together!
    
49. I must be in heaven cause I've seen an angel.
    
50. Come on baby, sex is like pizza: Even if it's bad, it's still pretty good.
    
51. Do you wanna have kids with me??? No? Then do you just wanna practice?
    
52. I wish you were a carousel at Wal-Mart so I could ride you all day long for just a quarter!!
    
53. Aw, girl, I'm gonna have to put you on my "To Do" List!
    
54. Save a horse -- ride a cowboy.
    
55. Hey baby, will you be my love buffet so I can lay you on the table and take what I want?
    
56. You know, it's not premarital sex unless you plan on getting married.
    
57. Hi, I make more money than you can spend.
    
58. I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue.
    
    
59. Your eyes are as blue as window cleaner.
    
60. Mmmm, you bring new meaning to the word "edible".
    
61. Hey babe, do you realize that my mouth can generate over 750 psi?
    
62. Hey babe, wanna get LUCKY!?!?!!
    
63. Sex is a killer...want to die happy?
    
64. Hi! Can I buy you a car?
    
65. I had sex with someone last night. Was that you?
    
66. You look like a hooker I knew in Fresno.
    
67. You're ugly but you intrigue me.
    
68. Hey baby...infect me!
    
69. Picture this, you, me, bubble baths, and a bottle of champagne.
    
70. No, I'm not a cop. What can I get for fifty bucks?
    
71. Be unique and different, say yes.
    
72. If you ever want to see your children again, you'll do what I want.
    
73. Inheriting Pick Up Lines 101eighty million bucks doesn't mean much when you have a weak heart.
    
    
74. If I had a rose for everytime I thought of you, I'd be walking in my garden forever.
    
75. You look so good, when I saw you I almost had a hard attack.
    
76. Sweetheart, you make me wanna get a job.
    
77. Excuse me, do you have a band-aid? I scraped my knee when I fell for you.
    
78. Helen was so lovely the Trojans climbed into a horse. You're so gorgeous I'd climb into a Trojan.
    
    
79. Nice legs. What time do they open?
    
80. I hope you have a library card because I checking you out.
    
81. I'm not drunk, I'm just intoxicated by you.
    
82. I'm feeling a little off today. Would you mind turning me on?
    
83. Since you lost your virginity, can I play with the box it came in?
    
84. You must eat a lot of lucky charms because you are magically delicious!
85. Your body's name must be Visa, because it's everywhere I want to be.
    
86. Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money
    
87. I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your bed rock
    
88. I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
    
89. Excuse me, do you have your phone number, I seem to have lost mine.
    
90. I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.
    
91. I'm new in town, could I have directions to your house.
    
92. If you were a new hamburger at McDonald's, you would be McGorgeous.
    
93. You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away
    
94. "If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning."
    
95. I wish you were a door so I could slam you all day.
    
96. Nice legs...what time do they open?
    
97. Do you work for UPS? I thought I saw you checking out my package.
    
98. You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?
    
99. Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?
    
100. I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.